Many people consider marriage to be one of their ultimate goals in life. Fall in love, get married, and live ‘happily ever after.’ But sometimes, life has other plans, feelings change and many married couples end up filing for divorce. Divorce rates among couples over 50 have doubled in the last 20 years, according to a study by Bowling Green State University. The divorce process can be complicated and overwhelming, but it’s still important to know the facts, be prepared, and take care of yourself.

First, the top five reasons for starting the divorce process in the U.S. include communication problems, infidelity or betrayal, financial problems, abuse and loss of interest. Some of these things can be improved through therapy or counseling, but others, such as abuse or infidelity, are much harder to address due to the nature of the emotional and sometimes physical damage involved. If you feel like your marriage may be coming to an end but still has a chance to work out, marriage counseling is a good first step to try before beginning the divorce process.

In our modern society, woman are no longer expected to do 100% of household duties such as cooking and cleaning. In fact, many woman have become the primary source of income in their homes. However, according to a Norwegian study released in August 2012, the divorce rate among couples who divide household chores is twice as high as those in which the wife handles the housework. While this does imply that the happiest marriages involve women doing most of the housework, there’s certainly a level of compromise that comes with marriage, and let’s face it – if you’re willing to proceed with the divorce process just because your wife isn’t doing enough housework, then you probably shouldn’t have gotten married in the first place. All in all, a marriage is between two responsible adults who should be able to clean up after themselves. So don’t get married and expect your wife to start being your servant.

Part of avoiding the divorce process is making sure you’re spending enough time with your spouse. Salespeople, optometrists, podiatrists, nuclear engineers and agricultural engineers are more likely to divorce than people in other professions, and that’s probably because of their demanding nature. Some people get so involved in their work that they bring the stress of their workplace home with them, affecting the entire household. Occasional venting is fine, but if you get home from work and can’t separate your work life from your home life, there’s a good chance it will have negative consequences on your marriage.

Finally, if you’re in a happy relationship and are feeling ready for marriage, don’t jump just yet. Living together before marriage is no longer a strong predictor of divorce, according to a study released by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention in early 2012. Living together before marriage is a great way to gauge what the marriage will be like. Living together before marriage for at least a year will increase the chance of having a successful marriage in the following years.

Overall, there are many factors that contribute to going through the divorce process. If you want to avoid having to deal with divorce forms, divorce lawyers, child custody attorneys, it’s all about communication. Talk to your spouse and listen to your spouse, and the rest will come naturally.